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1.) bluecat - 05/08/2017
A friend of mine told me of a huge cherry tree that had fallen on their property. I told them I wanted it and would use it for smoking. How big could it be, it's a cherry tree?
It had 4 or 5 trunks all emanating outward. Lightening, I'm guessing, struck and they all went their separate directions. Cut for about 5 hours and then called it good. I maybe got half of the tree. Most of those stumps were in the 80 to 100 pound range.
It had 4 or 5 trunks all emanating outward. Lightening, I'm guessing, struck and they all went their separate directions. Cut for about 5 hours and then called it good. I maybe got half of the tree. Most of those stumps were in the 80 to 100 pound range.
2.) Swamp Fox - 05/08/2017
Take a nap and some Motrin and go back for the rest!
You know you want to...
You know you want to...
3.) bluecat - 05/08/2017
LOL, you know me too well. I'm sore as hell.
4.) DParker - 05/08/2017
[QUOTE=Swamp Fox;48653]Take a nap and some Motrin and go back for the rest!
You know you want to...[/QUOTE]
[QUOTE=bluecat;48654]LOL, you know me too well. I'm sore as hell.[/QUOTE]
Yeah, getting wood really wears you out more and more as you get older.
You know you want to...[/QUOTE]
[QUOTE=bluecat;48654]LOL, you know me too well. I'm sore as hell.[/QUOTE]
Yeah, getting wood really wears you out more and more as you get older.
5.) bluecat - 05/08/2017
A man's got to know his limitations.
6.) DParker - 05/08/2017
[QUOTE=bluecat;48657]A man's got to know his limitations.[/QUOTE]
7.) bluecat - 05/08/2017
I had wood for more than 4 hours...
8.) DParker - 05/09/2017
You [I]did[/I] call your doctor, didn't you?
9.) bluecat - 05/09/2017
Technically, yes.
10.) Swamp Fox - 05/09/2017
With that much wood, you're gonna need a bigger trailer.
11.) bluecat - 05/09/2017
No complaints, yet.
12.) Swamp Fox - 05/09/2017
I had a George Washington joke for the JOTD thread, but I axed it because my delivery was wooden...
13.) Swamp Fox - 05/09/2017
What, no biting sarcasm about how ALL my jokes are bush league?
You people are slipping...
You people are slipping...
14.) Swamp Fox - 05/09/2017
Your bark is even less than your bite, and that's pretty gummy...
15.) bluecat - 05/09/2017
Your jokes seem to go against the grain.
16.) DParker - 05/09/2017
[QUOTE=bluecat;48661]Technically, yes.[/QUOTE]
[video=youtube;H2yJ-VaMDYs]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=H2yJ-VaMDYs[/video]
[video=youtube;H2yJ-VaMDYs]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=H2yJ-VaMDYs[/video]
17.) Swamp Fox - 05/09/2017
I thought they were pretty poplar, but I guess I had a stake in thinking so...
18.) Swamp Fox - 05/09/2017
[QUOTE=DParker;48672][video=youtube;H2yJ-VaMDYs]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=H2yJ-VaMDYs[/video][/QUOTE]
LOL...
Goodnight, everybody!....
LOL...
Goodnight, everybody!....
19.) bluecat - 05/09/2017
[QUOTE=Swamp Fox;48673]I thought they were pretty poplar, but I guess I had a stake in thinking so...[/QUOTE]
Sufferin' sassafras!
Sufferin' sassafras!
20.) Swamp Fox - 05/09/2017
I know I'm going out on a limb here, but if we can get this thread to five pages, I pity the sap who won't try for 10.
21.) bluecat - 05/09/2017
I knew sooner or later this thread would branch out.
22.) Swamp Fox - 05/09/2017
I'm not sure we can run rings around the horse or fish puns threads, but we can show we have the inner fiber to keep going before this thread goes on the ash heap of history.
23.) bluecat - 05/09/2017
Ah, the horse and fish pun threads. They really make me pine for the good ol' days.
24.) Swamp Fox - 05/09/2017
"I'm a qualified tree surgeon! I only do this job because I like being my own boss!"
25.) bluecat - 05/09/2017
I bet you like wearing women's underwear too.
[QUOTE=Swamp Fox;48680]"I'm a qualified tree surgeon! I only do this job because I like being my own boss!"[/QUOTE]
+2
[QUOTE=Swamp Fox;48680]"I'm a qualified tree surgeon! I only do this job because I like being my own boss!"[/QUOTE]
+2
26.) DParker - 05/09/2017
[QUOTE=Swamp Fox;48676]I know I'm going out on a limb here, but if we can get this thread to five pages, I pity the sap who won't try for 10.[/QUOTE]
Don't get yourself all knotted up about it, or else people will leave before this really bears fruit.
Don't get yourself all knotted up about it, or else people will leave before this really bears fruit.
27.) Swamp Fox - 05/09/2017
I'm treating this with too much pressure, huh?
I guess I shouldn't worry about everyone else, and just make sure I don't get tapped out myself.
I guess I shouldn't worry about everyone else, and just make sure I don't get tapped out myself.
28.) Swamp Fox - 05/09/2017
[QUOTE=bluecat;48683]I bet you like wearing women's underwear too.
+2[/QUOTE]
"I'm a lumberjack!"
LOL---
+3
+2[/QUOTE]
"I'm a lumberjack!"
LOL---
+3
29.) bluecat - 05/09/2017
[QUOTE=Swamp Fox;48685]I'm treating this with too much pressure, huh?
I guess I shouldn't worry about everyone else, and just make sure I don't get tapped out myself.[/QUOTE]
We understand. You're just throwing a little shade. No worries.
I guess I shouldn't worry about everyone else, and just make sure I don't get tapped out myself.[/QUOTE]
We understand. You're just throwing a little shade. No worries.
30.) DParker - 05/09/2017
Birch, birch, birch. Stop making an ash of yourself and spruce this place up a bit.
[QUOTE=Swamp Fox;48680]"I'm a qualified tree surgeon! I only do this job because I like being my own boss!"[/QUOTE]
That old chestnut again?
[QUOTE=Swamp Fox;48680]"I'm a qualified tree surgeon! I only do this job because I like being my own boss!"[/QUOTE]
That old chestnut again?
31.) bluecat - 05/09/2017
[QUOTE=Swamp Fox;48678]I'm not sure we can run rings around the horse or fish puns threads, but we can show we have the inner fiber to keep going before this thread goes on the ash heap of history.[/QUOTE]
Don't forget the vagina monologue.
Don't forget the vagina monologue.
32.) bluecat - 05/09/2017
I don't think I'm going out on a limb here, but that was some good stuff.
33.) Swamp Fox - 05/09/2017
[QUOTE=bluecat;48690]Don't forget the vagina monologue.[/QUOTE]
I didn't, but as I recall that was more of a goof thread with double entendre--at root--and less of a pun thread. But I could be wrong. Maybe I should go back and poke around in there and refresh my memory one summer eve.
I didn't, but as I recall that was more of a goof thread with double entendre--at root--and less of a pun thread. But I could be wrong. Maybe I should go back and poke around in there and refresh my memory one summer eve.
34.) bluecat - 05/09/2017
Gee, you're spot on...
35.) Swamp Fox - 05/09/2017
LOL... +3...
But back to the forkin' trees...
But back to the forkin' trees...
36.) bluecat - 05/09/2017
I'm stumped.
37.) Swamp Fox - 05/09/2017
I saw that coming.
Maybe it's time for a prune.
Maybe it's time for a prune.
38.) bluecat - 05/09/2017
Prunes, figs, whatever it takes to keep things moving.
39.) Jon - 05/10/2017
I was bush hogging one of the farms yesterday and the state had clearcut an area so they could get vehicles out into the marsh to erect some Osprey nests. They neatly piled up a few trees they had to cut down, cut into 4' sections, stacked easily so I could fill my tractor bucket and drop into the bed of my truck. Yes, oak and cherry. That's a score for me since I've been slowly cutting the hardwood trees out of my woods and I only have so much. I found several piles, all of which are coming home with me.
Sorry to get this thread back on topic, don't mean to ruin your wood fest.
Sorry to get this thread back on topic, don't mean to ruin your wood fest.
40.) Swamp Fox - 05/10/2017
Applegies not necessary....You don't need our persimmon to post, oak? In fact, we wish you wood chime in more often, fir the sake of variety.
41.) bluecat - 05/10/2017
[QUOTE=Swamp Fox;48724]Applegies not necessary....You don't need our persimmon to post, oak? In fact, we wish you wood chime in more often, fir the sake of variety.[/QUOTE]
Nice going. +4
Nice going. +4
42.) bluecat - 05/10/2017
Sounded like Jon was hedging a bit on whether to post or not.
43.) Swamp Fox - 05/10/2017
[QUOTE=bluecat;48725]Nice going. +4[/QUOTE]
Thanks. I credit Juan Valdez and his magic beans.
Thanks. I credit Juan Valdez and his magic beans.
44.) Bob Peck - 05/10/2017
[QUOTE=Jon;48722]I was bush hogging one of the farms yesterday and the state had clearcut an area so they could get vehicles out into the marsh to erect some Osprey nests. [/QUOTE]
Just curious what kind of vehicles? 4-wheelers? Here in VA when the state does stuff like that they lay down literally hundreds of wooden pallets along the path in order to provide traction to everything from 4-wheelers to 4WD trucks to bucket trucks. It's definitely *not* low impact. Over time though the pallets rot, the grass grows back and the clear cut is visible for several years.
[QUOTE=Jon;48722]That's a score for me since I've been slowly cutting the hardwood trees out of my woods and I only have so much.[/QUOTE]
Wondering why you are cutting out the slow growing, highly valuable hardwoods?
Just curious what kind of vehicles? 4-wheelers? Here in VA when the state does stuff like that they lay down literally hundreds of wooden pallets along the path in order to provide traction to everything from 4-wheelers to 4WD trucks to bucket trucks. It's definitely *not* low impact. Over time though the pallets rot, the grass grows back and the clear cut is visible for several years.
[QUOTE=Jon;48722]That's a score for me since I've been slowly cutting the hardwood trees out of my woods and I only have so much.[/QUOTE]
Wondering why you are cutting out the slow growing, highly valuable hardwoods?
45.) bluecat - 05/10/2017
[QUOTE=Swamp Fox;48728]Thanks. I credit Juan Valdez and his magic beans.[/QUOTE]
You should try the Kentucky Coffee beans...
You should try the Kentucky Coffee beans...
46.) bluecat - 05/10/2017
[QUOTE=Bob Peck;48729]Just curious what kind of vehicles? 4-wheelers? Here in VA when the state does stuff like that they lay down literally hundreds of wooden pallets along the path in order to provide traction to everything from 4-wheelers to 4WD trucks to bucket trucks. It's definitely *not* low impact. Over time though the pallets rot, the grass grows back and the clear cut is visible for several years.
Wondering why you are cutting out the slow growing, highly valuable hardwoods?[/QUOTE]
Not to mention the load of nails that are now ready for foot, paw or tire.
I'm with Bob, why are you removing the hardwoods? What did they ever do to you?
Wondering why you are cutting out the slow growing, highly valuable hardwoods?[/QUOTE]
Not to mention the load of nails that are now ready for foot, paw or tire.
I'm with Bob, why are you removing the hardwoods? What did they ever do to you?
47.) Swamp Fox - 05/10/2017
[QUOTE=bluecat;48732]You should try the Kentucky Coffee beans...[/QUOTE]
LOL...+4
Thanks, but after lunch I switch to Mormon tea.
LOL...+4
Thanks, but after lunch I switch to Mormon tea.
48.) bluecat - 05/10/2017
Okay, that was a first for me. Thanks goggle. LOL!
Do you like your Hemlock sweetened or unsweetened?
Do you like your Hemlock sweetened or unsweetened?
49.) Swamp Fox - 05/10/2017
Sweet, but I use strychnine instead of sugar. That's the stuff in the pink packets, right?
50.) bluecat - 05/10/2017
Sweet, I mean cool. I like to put a pinch of Bella Donna in it for giggles. Gives it kind of an earthy taste. If I'm not going to be operating any machinery I might add a smidgeon of Curare too.
51.) DParker - 05/10/2017
[QUOTE=Swamp Fox;48749]Sweet, but I use strychnine instead of sugar. That's the stuff in the pink packets, right?[/QUOTE]
That Stevia crap will kill you too...
That Stevia crap will kill you too...
52.) bluecat - 05/10/2017
...but but but, it's all natural.
53.) Swamp Fox - 05/10/2017
There's a restaurant here called Bella Donna...I've always been afraid to eat there.
54.) bluecat - 05/10/2017
I hear the food is to die for.
55.) bluecat - 05/10/2017
Their pokeweed, caster bean salad with poppy seed vinaigrette is an interestingly sweet refreshing summer salad choice.
56.) bluecat - 05/10/2017
Nobody orders seconds though.
57.) Swamp Fox - 05/10/2017
Poppies...poppies...
And I was wondering when we'd get around to poke salad...
:grin:
And I was wondering when we'd get around to poke salad...
:grin:
58.) bluecat - 05/10/2017
Well, when I grew up, we were poor...LOL!
59.) DParker - 05/10/2017
[QUOTE=bluecat;48761]Well, when I grew up, we were poor...LOL![/QUOTE]
Right. I had to get up in the morning at ten o'clock at night, half an hour before I went to bed...
Right. I had to get up in the morning at ten o'clock at night, half an hour before I went to bed...
60.) Swamp Fox - 05/10/2017
But you try and tell the young people today that... and they won't believe ya!
61.) bluecat - 05/10/2017
You went to bed?
62.) Swamp Fox - 05/10/2017
You were lucky to HAVE a bed...
LOL
LOL
63.) bluecat - 05/10/2017
[QUOTE=Swamp Fox;48760]
:grin:[/QUOTE]
I was so poor I only had two names.
:grin:[/QUOTE]
I was so poor I only had two names.
64.) Swamp Fox - 05/10/2017
Life was never easy for me...
65.) Jon - 05/11/2017
Bob, the state used those high flotation tire trucks because they go right out into the marsh and install the nesting poles. No need to lay down any pallets or metal grates, the trucks go right over pretty much anything .
I cut the hardwoods because I'm using them for fire wood. I'm not clear cutting by any stretch of the imagination, just selectively cutting a few large oaks a year to feed my wood stove. I now have a 2 year supply of seasoned wood so the trees I cut this year will lay in 4' sections and be cut next summer (2018) for use that winter and I'll always have a rotating supply of seasoned wood to use.
I cut the hardwoods because I'm using them for fire wood. I'm not clear cutting by any stretch of the imagination, just selectively cutting a few large oaks a year to feed my wood stove. I now have a 2 year supply of seasoned wood so the trees I cut this year will lay in 4' sections and be cut next summer (2018) for use that winter and I'll always have a rotating supply of seasoned wood to use.
66.) bluecat - 05/11/2017
[QUOTE=Swamp Fox;48760]
[/QUOTE]
Most people don't know that Tim Kaine started off as an actor.
[/QUOTE]Most people don't know that Tim Kaine started off as an actor.
67.) Swamp Fox - 05/11/2017
[QUOTE=Jon;48784]...
I cut the hardwoods because I'm using them for fire wood...[/QUOTE]
Wish I could magically teleport a big red oak near me to you. A tree guy took it down more than a month ago and it's still sitting where they dumped it on the side of a private road. Maybe it was a leaner, but they had to go into the woods for it, and I never noticed it though I drive past there all the time, so who knows...Maybe it was just in the way for some future project.
I thought somebody would come for it, but no. Seems like a colossal waste all around. I'm guessing 8-foot sections, almost two feet across, and four or five sections. Almost makes me nostalgic for the days when I heated with wood, LOL.
I cut the hardwoods because I'm using them for fire wood...[/QUOTE]
Wish I could magically teleport a big red oak near me to you. A tree guy took it down more than a month ago and it's still sitting where they dumped it on the side of a private road. Maybe it was a leaner, but they had to go into the woods for it, and I never noticed it though I drive past there all the time, so who knows...Maybe it was just in the way for some future project.
I thought somebody would come for it, but no. Seems like a colossal waste all around. I'm guessing 8-foot sections, almost two feet across, and four or five sections. Almost makes me nostalgic for the days when I heated with wood, LOL.
68.) Swamp Fox - 05/11/2017
[QUOTE=bluecat;48785]Most people don't know that Tim Kaine started off as an actor.[/QUOTE]
He's a little rusty...(yuk, yuk)...Every time he's on TV or in the news, I imagine a little thought bubble over his head that says, "What's my motivation? What's my motivation?" as doughy nonsense flows from his mouth.
He's a little rusty...(yuk, yuk)...Every time he's on TV or in the news, I imagine a little thought bubble over his head that says, "What's my motivation? What's my motivation?" as doughy nonsense flows from his mouth.
69.) bluecat - 05/11/2017
[QUOTE=Swamp Fox;48787]He's a little rusty...(yuk, yuk)...Every time he's on TV or in the news, I imagine a little thought bubble over his head that says, "What's my motivation? What's my motivation?" as doughy nonsense flows from his mouth.[/QUOTE]
No, look at the monkey.
No, look at the monkey.
70.) Bob Peck - 05/11/2017
[QUOTE=Jon;48784]I now have a 2 year supply of seasoned wood so the trees I cut this year will lay in 4' sections and be cut next summer (2018) for use that winter and I'll always have a rotating supply of seasoned wood to use.[/QUOTE] Sounds like a man with a plan. Thanks for the update. I was losing sleep thinking of you denuding your land.:laugh:
71.) Swamp Fox - 05/11/2017
[QUOTE=bluecat;48789]No, look at the monkey.[/QUOTE]
Okay, I see it now...Eyes and mouth.
Good catch, LOL.
Okay, I see it now...Eyes and mouth.
Good catch, LOL.